posted March 15, 2003 10:22 AM               

10. Archiving Rip Hunter has played havok with the space-time continuum. He's posting in 44 B.C. but the Internet appears to be an ARRAY OF REFLECTING MIRRORS.

9. Stuck in a phone booth while changing into his Superman costume for Mardi Gras.

8-1. [your turn]

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Bgztl a/k/a Jack Holt

All of human wisdom is summed up in two words: wait and hope.

posted March 15, 2003 02:05 PM               

"What's the CONSPIRACY, Bob???"

Over & over & over...

There's all the reason Bob would need to avoid this place.

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Rock a little,

posted March 15, 2003 03:37 PM               

-Steve

posted March 16, 2003 06:08 PM            

quote:

---

Originally posted by DaBubba:
Is too busy with his collection of DC character Tijuana bibles.

---

posted March 17, 2003 11:04 AM            

accidently wandered into the GL boards and was pummeled senseless when he mentioned he thought Tomar Re was much cooler than either Kyle or Hal.

posted March 17, 2003 03:17 PM               

quote:

---

Originally posted by klinton:
....um....didn't you guys know? Bob got fired...

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posted March 22, 2003 04:08 PM               

10. Archiving Rip Hunter has played havok with the space-time continuum. He's posting in 44 B.C. but the Internet appears to be an ARRAY OF REFLECTING MIRRORS.

9. Stuck in a phone booth while changing into his Superman costume for Mardi Gras.

8. A magic ring given to him by a dying witch doctor has transferred his mind into the body of a golden gorilla, and his new fingers are too big and clumsy to type.

7. He's too busy putting together THE COMPLETE SUGAR AND SPIKE VOLUME.

AND NOW THIS INTERRUPTION FROM MADONNA:

"...He got tired of over-aged fanboys telling him how to package his product..."

WHO WAS INTERRUPTED BY PAUL IN HIS "GROOVY" MODE:

"Disappointed at lack of interest in Batman-related tpb discussion."

WHO WAS PUT IN HIS PLACE BY DR. PHIL:

The whiners who KEPT hounding Bob, even though he politely asked them to quit, about "WHY can't there be any LEGION LOST or LEGION WORLDS TPBS????"

"What's the CONSPIRACY, Bob???"

Over & over & over...

"How's that working out for 'em???"

MADONNA, PAUL, AND DR. PHIL ARE QUIETLY TAKEN OUT BY CREAM PIE TO THE YAPPER.

6. Bob found Julie Schwartz's Cosmic Treadmill in a storage room, and is now stuck on Earth-1... WHICH DOESN'T EXIST!!!

5. He's too busy preparing the "Questions for Bob Greenberger" TPB and limited edition hardcover. It's currently slated for an August 6th release to coincide with the action figures from DC Direct. The figures should be pretty neat from what I hear. The DStepp figure comes with a little survey, my figure comes with maps of all of the Golden Age Archives, Owen's has the Silver Age volumes... [Audience begins to get restless and Dave goes in for the "kill"]

4. Is too busy with his collection of DC character Tijuana bibles. (Audience laughs nervously because can't remember if Tijuana is a place or a brand of liquor]

3. Finally realized the DC Archives Message Board is not a chick magnet.

2. He's deeply involved in negotiations with the Shuster estate over the planned Superbaby Archives.

Superbaby? see that's funny. Wait maybe they're still confused about # 2

"Is too busy with his collection of DC character Tijuana bibles."

"Actually, he's collecting them to put in an Archive, you know..."

The audience is right!

The card and number two go over the shoulder.

New 3. Disappointed that no one's asked about the Little Dot Archives.

New 2. Too busy finding someone to write the intro to the Red Bee archives.

New 1. Accidently wandered into the GL boards and was pummeled senseless when he mentioned he thought Tomar Re was much cooler than either Kyle or Hal.

Bu-dum-dum!!!

Painful denouement as Dave deconstructs each and every joke:

Trapped in a hot tub with a dozen super models. ( maybe this place is a chick magnet after all?)

Heh Heh.

(toothy grin)

PAUL (brushing cream pie off face): ....um....didn't you guys know? Bob got fired...

BIFF (back from semi-retirement) :

The DC site is rumored to be getting a facelift soon. Maybe he's waiting for that to make his big return.

DAVE: Oh right Biff. THAT must be it!!

Thanks guys.

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Bgztl a/k/a Jack Holt

All of human wisdom is summed up in two words: wait and hope.